They told me to come to my senses;
When they don’t know where I came from;
They didn’t know the road I took
The mishaps, the roadblocks I endured;
The bruises I got;
The sunshine I tried so hard to produce;
The pain I endured;
The touch of gold
I had to give myself;
They didn’t know how awoke I was;
As I dream with my eyes wide open;
And chill with flames;
I watch every paper burn;
Every feeling stained;
I burn every bridge I cross;
In my head;
Since I was a kid;
I was told
That I would die
If I don’t hold the end of a rope.
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Love begets love

Posted: November 1, 2018 in Poetry: Poems I Made
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It’s the eyes
That looks after
Your cold heart
In a brisk of drought

It’s the hand
That reaches you

It’s the arms
That protects you
From serpents
And sandstorms

It’s he who reads your mind
Destroys your walls,
Protects your core…

It’s him

Love begets love

I will always remember how his hands felt on my hair,
How his glaring eyes would burn
My winter-frozen heart

How he blissfully locked a chain of unexplained feeling…
that only two people can tell..
How can I forget the unforgettable feeling
That only grows when he’s around….

He gladly became the reason of my tears at night;
The bliss in my morning who walks nameless;
I can feel the sparkle of summer rain
In the middle of my winter night, he smiles.

With you… happiness becomes sadness
And sadness, becomes happiness

Because being with you.. knows no boundaries…

With you…I can see clearly in darkness;
I can say a word, without saying anything,
I can hear you, even if you don’t utter a word

 

[ Poetry Duet with Genessa Paje]

My Journey: When it started
Exactly eighteen years ago, when I first wrote and collected my poems. I had a dream that someday, when I’m grown up and had a job, I would publish a poetry collection. Writing has been my outlet since I was young, while I had no best-friend to confine with, paper and pen had been my company. I filled five (5) notebooks with poems back then. Sadly, odds were not in my favor – my mom kept these manuscripts and never found them again. I was brokenhearted since then. Swearing that I will never write again, because it will always be gone.

My Journey: The Restart
In 2012, my mom was diagnosed with Breast Cancer, which shook me a lot. Thinking of all the things that can help me clear my mind, during those devastating moments, I opened a blog site (which is my current site). I thought of resorting to letting my thoughts out through writing. It didn’t work out. I was thankful that I had my best friends to be with me during difficult times. My mom passed because of Stage 4 Breast Cancer. Months after, I was devastated. I made peace with her passing and eventually, got used to the life I had back then. I was really a soft creature before she left. I resorted to writing months after she left, slowly, I came back to writing Poetry.

My Journey: Fast Forward
Besides the  heartbreak that I had when I lost the poems that my 13 year old self wrote, I thought, it is safe to write via internet. Fast forward, I started collecting my poems, categorized each of them, from 2012-2014. then kept collecting them per year. Since March is my birth month, I  set it as a cut-off.

Take that small step.
I’ve had self publications made in 2014, when I go to a local print shop (Piso Print), which has very cheap printing cost. Even the binding cost was cheap, although because of the low quality, I never made it available to the market, thus, selling the first copies to my friends and in the latter part, I gave them as gifts to my closest friends.

A Collaboration
I did not know what courageous spirit has gotten into me, but for some luck and brave spirit, I decided my eight book to be published. Since I was thinking that this will get me exposure, I decided to feature artists and a photographer. Through God’s grace and mercy, we were able to finish the poetry collection around April of 2018. I contacted local publishing houses, around June, but to no luck. It’s either, my timing is off or they do not print poetry content, which I understand. Until, I found KF DigiPress’ page in Facebook, a local printing company. Fast forward, not only that About Me & You was printed, but, it was made available in the 39th Manila International Book Fair in SMX Pasay, PH.

I was really thankful to everyone who had my back along the way. Most of all, I am thankful to God for letting me experience all of this, in my lifetime. So to all poets out there, keep going. I hope I am able to inspire you 🙂

Lovelots,
Lena

 

 

 

I see you

Posted: March 6, 2018 in Poetry: Poems I Made
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Everything seems to be too momentarily
The stops, the pauses
Pass by like a lifetime
Before my eyes
Like a mirror
A memory of a familiar face
Now unknown to me,
Leaning towards my face
In a distant place from here,
A place with no goodbyes
I think in a memory before time,
I see you.

I realized
My love was dead
for years

For the face I saw
Few days past
Was just another face
Like his

For the name I uttered
Few months past
Was just another name
Like his

But it was not him
At all.

A stranger I recognize.

But not a love
I used to know.

It was just
Another familiar face
Another familiar name
I see in a street.

 

 

Snowfall

Posted: January 8, 2018 in Poetry: Poems I Made
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And she turned herself to a snow
Because she knows
It was the only way
She can touch his face
And make him blush

And she came around
Even if not wintertime
And with all wonder,
His face asked,

But there were no words
She just continue to fall

Sunsets

Posted: January 8, 2018 in Poetry: Poems I Made
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He was just like a sunset
Beautifully peaceful
Calming in every sense
He was an ending
Of a beautiful day
And a dawning
Of a lonely night

And she,
She was an ocean
Always calling for his name
But when he finally arrives
Takes a minute or two to stay,

And at night,
She just shine
Knowing her love is gone
She roars the tides
Some drown in her
Some live
She roars, regardless
For the love it will see again
But never stay

Tenant

Posted: January 8, 2018 in Poetry: Poems I Made
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You were just like the darkness in a tunnel
I once walked in…
There was a clue I will be getting in there,
Then one fine day
I was inside that tunnel
I saw you
Your chest,
Empty,
I do not get to see first
And so I came
Little by little
Because
I saw
You
But…
I never get to see everything that will follow
But who cares
You were my home
And now
You are a closed door
And I,
A tenant waiting outside
Waiting for the doors to open
But you were locked
So I stayed
Waited
Kissed the rain
Felt the sun lighting on my face
Days and days passed
Years
Decades
Centuries
There was a notice
That you were never going to open
And so I smiled
And one fine day
Waited still
For the rays of the sun
For the rain to drop
I can’t tell the difference anymore
between a sunny and a rainy day
Between summer and winter
I can barely tell
Everything felt
Just the same
Before you came,
Pointless.

Solitude

Posted: January 8, 2018 in Poetry: Poems I Made
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And before I shut everybody out
May you be at the front door
Holding, Gasping the spaces
For it is dark inside this walls I built
I never liked hiding here.
But every time pain visits,
I go inside
For peace
For serenity
Because
I waited for you
And you
Never came
That’s why,
I had to learn how to survive – alone.

You were always far away to me
A distant dream
That I only catch
When I close my eyes

I whispered to the air
Long before
I saw you

And I knew,
Prayers are answered
Dreams do come true

And I felt this love
That has been written
Long before

I felt this love
And now,
It’s happening

It’s making me afraid
To leave
Without having to feel this

But somehow,
A promise is being made

A promise of forever
To always remember

This love, that I feel
I will treasure

And I promise to remember
Everything about you
I will carry through

Love

Posted: September 3, 2017 in Poetry: Poems I Made
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Love doesn’t ask much;
She knew she doesn’t have to.

Love knew that though he was breaking her heart,
He was protecting her in the meanest and kindest way possible.

Love knew that a hard labor can only buy her a pair of hairclip;
So she let her hair down instead.

Love knew pain like her best friend;
yet, love also knows forgiveness.

Love knew life was hard already
So she held his hand and never let him go.

Clean

Posted: September 3, 2017 in Poetry: Poems I Made
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I thought I prefer to see his face
With no beard nor mustache;

But when I saw him,
I knew I was wrong;

And all the ideas of him
Was gone from my head
I knew I was seeing the man that he is;
The raw, the 2 AM version of him
Is standing right in front of my very eyes

But I still got razor in my hand
And a cream;
I was waiting for my turn,
But when he came to me,

I just stared at him like an idiot,
Smiling,
Throwing a glance on his pretty damn eyes
Admiring the mess in his baffling face.

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Image  —  Posted: September 1, 2017 in Poetry: Poems I Made
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Maybe’s

Posted: August 30, 2017 in Poetry: Poems I Made
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Maybe I wasn’t supposed to be
feeling this way,
Because maybe, just maybe
We just thought that it was meant to be
When it should never have started
To begin with.

Share

Posted: August 19, 2017 in Poetry: Poems I Made
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You can’t always wish for the rain to stop
You can’t always wait for the storm to pass
But you can always share your umbrella to someone who doesn’t have one

 

Him

Posted: June 27, 2017 in Poetry: Poems I Made
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Imagine a woman sitting on a couch and a man opening the door, with those heavy footsteps, he enters the room, towards the 5 1/2 people in the room.
All the time, she was looking at him, these are her thoughts:

There he walked into the room
Every step he took
Seemed like heavy years
In my heart being taken out

There he sat,
In front of me
I looked at his face
Memorizing every detail

Then I looked at his eyes
And I recognized
It was my true love

The one that had never come
Until that day…
The feeling was unexplainably beautiful
Just like his sad eyes

 

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Image  —  Posted: May 17, 2017 in Poetry: Poems I Made
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Image  —  Posted: May 17, 2017 in Poetry: Poems I Made
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One day, I walked past a road
Then get stuck in a tunnel of black
Real black darkness,
Sadness, therein.
And on the mid-road of the tunnel
I saw those eyes speaking red
Glaring fumes of sadness in bed
I saw his empty chest; his heart being taken out
By a monster that had disappeared way past;
A memory which haunted his dearest heart
I reached for my heart; though still bleeding
And touched his face as I gave him my heart
With glimmering bliss;
And on that tunnel we walked out both
We felt the light beaming in our faces
Suddenly our breathe were warm
We felt life again.
Love was there again.
Love has always been there.
I looked at my chest, it was empty.
I had no heart. It was already his.
It was his, in the first place.

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Image  —  Posted: February 12, 2017 in Poetry: Poems I Made
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Image  —  Posted: February 11, 2017 in Poetry: Poems I Made
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Image  —  Posted: February 10, 2017 in Poetry: Poems I Made
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Heal

Posted: February 10, 2017 in Poetry: Poems I Made
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Take me back to the time
When we would smile
And my mom would shoot you
And I would block the bullet
And I would hug your silhouette

And we would meet at the street
And you would say that I can pass by
And we would meet like we’ve never been hurt
Like we’ve never cried
Like we’ve never been wrecked

Take me back to the time
When the streets call my name
And you would drive at 2 AM
And there would be just the same
There will only be your name

And we would love like there has never been pain
Like we weren’t been two broken pieces
Trying to heal each other for so long
But afraid to go after our home
So I look out and see you walking pass by me

Vulnerable

Posted: February 5, 2017 in Poetry: Poems I Made
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